I’ve taken some time to figure out if and how to respond to the overwhelming reaction to the Celebrity 101 post. The last thing I wanted to do was respond emotionally which is what got me into this in the first place. I’ve been hesitant to say anything because I fear that anything I say at this point will be misconstrued. I’m also hesitant because I don’t want to continue to fuel the negativity any further. The reason, however, that I am responding is for two reasons. One, I think sometimes we just want our voices to be heard and our feelings validated — I assure you, you have been heard and I understand – and two, I feel there’s a greater issue here that needs to be addressed.
First, let me say that many of your criticisms were valid. The post was an emotional response that I shared publicly. Was the comparison between celebrities in a public versus private moment poor? Absolutely. Did I properly and thoroughly explain the interaction? No. Were the feelings I shared genuine? Yes. Did my emotions get the best of me? Certainly.
However negatively it came across, that was my truth in that moment. The blessing and curse of a blog is that it’s out there immediately, typos and all. It wasn’t my finest hour. Never in a million years did I think that my rant in a weak moment would turn into what it did. But here we are.
I want to clear up one thing that may be irrelevant at this point, but it’s a comment that stuck with me. Some said I had a “personal vendetta” against Adam. There was no vendetta and there continues to be no vendetta. I said it before and I’ll say it again – I respect Adam as an artist, like his music, and appreciate how he’s used his platform.
While this whole experience has been a learning lesson for me in many ways, what is most upsetting is the cyber bullying that took place as a result, not just directed at me in the comments and via twitter, but also directed at anonymous commenters. The name calling was horrendous. It became clear to me quite quickly that there is a fan base who as one said “are way more than just fans,” a community of Adam Lambert followers who run the gamut from haters to lovers and everything in between and all around, and who amazingly all seem to know one another, if only online.
Those who criticized with respect were heard and appreciated – it was a fair assessment. When name calling and personal attacks come into play, it’s a dead end for discussion. How have derogatory names or threats of physical violence ever helped any situation?
The Internet is a crazy thing – it’s so easy to hide behind a screen name or a twitter handle and go on the attack. I realize the potential hypocrisy as many believe I did just that, but I respectfully disagree – I never called names. I never personally attacked, however off base or insensitive the feelings were that I exposed. I also don’t believe Adam, who has been vocal about anti-bullying campaigns, would like his ambassadors to be ridiculing, belittling, or calling names of anyone on a blog, whether it’s the writer or those commenting. It was incredibly sad to read the back and forth commentary that became so contentious and inflammatory. It was upsetting that the post was the conduit in allowing that to happen.
Cyber bullying is a very real thing and becoming all too common. My hope is that a negative can be turned into a positive. Moving forward, if we are engaging in the blogosphere, however fair or unfair, well-executed or poorly-executed the content may be, that we will do so with respect and dignity for each person’s opinion.
I’m certain that I haven’t addressed each and every criticism. I’m certain there will be critics of this response. And I’m certain that this response is not perfect. I’m human and there’s a person here behind the keyboard. I’m doing the best I can in a situation that I brought upon myself. I hope that we can move on so we can direct our energies in more positive pursuits.